(edifying: building the other person in the ways of God and in the grace of God)
Most secular conversations stir up fleshly things that cause worry or concern or jealousy or lust of the flesh and are even harmful;
James 1:26 If any man among you seem to be religious, and bridleth not his tongue, but deceiveth his own heart, this man's religion is vain.
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Comments by Joan Boney:
I constantly pray for God to give me that which HE wants spoken.
And often I judge my words by this: Did what I write or speak show the other person the way of God? Did that word build the other person in faith in God? Did my words bring edification to the other person?
(edify: to build in the faith in God)
Did I show what God did in my words?
Did I speak what God wanted spoken?
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Sometimes we have to correct another person.
I try to do this in the right spirit, without bitterness and without malice,
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Often I have to use the example of what some other person did, to instruct the church and to warn the church.
God showed me the apostle Paul warning the church in the following, and even naming the offender by name.
14 Alexander the coppersmith did me much evil: the Lord reward him according to his works: Of whom be thou ware also; for he hath greatly withstood our words.
16 At my first answer no man stood with me, but all men forsook me: I pray God that it may not be laid to their charge.
17 Notwithstanding the Lord stood with me, and strengthened me; that by me the preaching might be fully known, and that all the Gentiles might hear: and I was delivered out of the mouth of the lion.
18 And the Lord shall deliver me from every evil work, and will preserve me unto HIS heavenly kingdom: to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen.
The words of the New Testament Bible are important examples used by the Spirit of God to show us what we also must do.
We must keep ourselves at all times regardless of the actions of other people.
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I believe we grieve the Holy Spirit if we misuse the Word of God.
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In training me, God showed me sometimes we must speak harshly.
Matthew 23:33 Jesus said to the scribes and Pharisees: Ye serpents, ye generation of vipers, how can ye escape the damnation of hell?
John the Baptist also spoke harshly to the scribes and Pharisees:
Matthew 3:7-10 But when he saw many of the Pharisees and Sadducees come to his baptism, he said unto them, O generation of vipers, who hath warned you to flee from the wrath to come? Bring forth therefore fruits meet for repentance: And think not to say within yourselves, We have Abraham to our father: for I say unto you, that God is able of these stones to raise up children unto Abraham. And now also the axe is laid unto the root of the trees: therefore every tree which bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire.
To the church, the apostle Paul said:
II Corinthians 12:21 And lest, when I come again, my God will humble me among you, and that I shall bewail many which have sinned already, and have not repented of the uncleanness and fornication and lasciviousness which they have committed.
bewail: express with deep regret and sadness; mourn over; grieve over; express with great sorrow; beat one's breast about; show disappointment over their actions
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We must deal with that other person in the way God shows us to deal with him.
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An exterminator came to our house to do some work. Almost immediately he began telling us that he is a Christian.
The problem at the house was with mice. We had seen some mice inside the house.
The exterminator said, "You can always pray that the mice go to the house of a neighbor that you hate."
I was very shocked that a man who said he is a Christian would say this.
I replied, "I don't have any neighbors that I hate."
(He did not appear to see his evil that he had spoken.)
He went on to tell us about ministry work that he does from time to time going from city to city. He started naming the cities and I stopped him and asked, "How did God show you to do this work?"
He froze ... and he could not answer my question.
I told him I did not believe God sent him to do these things.
The Holy Spirit brought the following scripture to my mind. I believe this applied to this man:
Matthew 7:21-23 Jesus said: Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven.
22 Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works?
23 And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.
I think at one point I told this man to leave my room.
As he left, in a happy, carefree, flippant way he said, "Have a good day."
I replied, "You go to hell."
I believe that got his attention. He fled to his vehicle and sat in it until Pam took his check to him.
Without a word he then drove away.
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